The good and the BAD Days

Infertility is tricky. I’m sure my husband would agree. I have really good days where I’m optimistic and excited for the future. And then there are really, really bad days where all I want to do is crawl in my bed and cry. There are days where I barely make it in the door from work without bursting into tears. There are days when all I want to ask is “Why me, God?” Today is one of those really hard days.

Through all of the downs, the Lord has spoken to me time and time again through the song “Ever Be” by Bethel. It’s lyrics are just so perfect for how I’m feeling. And, even when I’m mad at God and questioning why He would put me through something that is so hard, something that I feel like I can’t handle, this song speaks to me. And I know that He has been faithful. And He always will be.

And, this video for the song is absolutely incredible. It leaves me speechless. Today, it was a hard day, and I don’t understand why I’m having to go through this. But, this song gives me some peace and comfort in a very turbulent area of my life.

If you’re interested, watch the music video here:

And, these are the lyrics to this incredible song:

“Ever Be”

Your love is devoted like a ring of solid gold
Like a vow that is tested like a covenant of old
Your love is enduring through the winter rain
And beyond the horizon with mercy for today

Faithful You have been and faithful you will be
You pledge yourself to me and it’s why I sing

Your praise will ever be on my lips, ever be on my lips
Your praise will ever be on my lips, ever be on my lips
Your praise will ever be on my lips, ever be on my lips
Your praise will ever be on my lips, ever be on my lips

You Father the orphan
Your kindness makes us whole
And you shoulder our weakness
And your strength becomes our own
Now you’re making me like you
Clothing me in white
Bringing beauty from ashes
For You will have Your bride

Free of all her guilt and rid of all her shame
And known by her true name and it’s why I sing

Your praise will ever be on my lips, ever be on my lips
Your praise will ever be on my lips, ever be on my lips
Your praise will ever be on my lips, ever be on my lips
Your praise will ever be on my lips, ever be on my lips

You will be praised You will be praised
With angels and saints we sing worthy are You Lord
You will be praised You will be praised
With angels and saints we sing worthy are You Lord

And it’s why I sing
Your praise will ever be on my lips, ever be on my lips
Your praise will ever be on my lips, ever be on my lips
Your praise will ever be on my lips, ever be on my lips
Your praise will ever be on my lips, ever be on my lips

 

Today was hard. A lot of days are hard. Most days are hard. But, on these days, I try to repeat to myself over and over “Your praise will ever be on my lips.” And, I pray that someday I will understand why God picked me to be on this journey. Until then, I repeat this song over and over in my head and pray that God blesses Evan and I with a child.

And for education:

 

Infertility is NOT an inconvenience; it is a disease of the reproductive system that impairs the body’s ability to perform the basic function of reproduction.

Source: The American Society for Reproductive Medicine

 

 

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